Been a while...

OMG has it been a while.

Trying to explain the last few weeks I posted this on my FB page:

We have been in whirlwind of house chaos. Our buyers have been struggling with a snafu from their previous house. They needed a magic letter clearing them of responsibility. We did not find out about this until a week or so into the contract. For a time we were in complete limbo. On the day of contract expiration we were desperately ready to move on and find another buyer. Someone must have rubbed the genie lamp because the magic letter arrived. We agreed to extend the contract if the buyer would provide more due diligence money. During all of this we were having inspections completed on the house to purchase. We knew it was a renovation project and looked forward to creating something special with the house. Turns out our entire renovation budget would have to be used just to fix "little" things. The fireplace needed a complete firebox rebuild, there was previous termite damage, and the pool needed at least $1000 worth of repair. This is a just a few things of a much longer "little" list. We walked away. So we had a buyer but no house to buy. Then we found another. It doesn't have a pool but there is NO renovation needed. Everyone gets their space and there is recreation space too. We could add a pool, but it may not be worth it. Time will tell. We offered, they countered, we accepted. As of right now it seems the planets and stars are in alignment. Hopefully no more magic will be needed to make it all work. One month and we move. Looking forward to the next step!

This has been a royal mess.  I have NEVER had a business deal be so difficult. The buyers agent is complete and total PITA, an arrogant  individual whose ego is easily bruised and supercedes any humanity he has.

We are still moving forward with the house deal.  The inspection was last Wednesday.  The buyer was insisting that we close the 15th.  Not possible. Because of all the other delays we ended up starting over and offering on another home. Our loan paperwork is back to square one.  Our lender was skeptical that our desired closing of the 22nd was going to work.  When our agent explained the logistics of us closing on the 15th and being homeless for a week the buyer's agent stated that the contract says the 15th and that's what we want. Um...still not possible dude.  On inspection day we left a letter on the table.

We have done the math and it will cost us more than $4200 if you refuse to move closing one week.  That is IF we could actually book a hotel for us and three kids, and board the dogs for an entire week...which would stress them severely.  Sawyer, the black lab, is a rescue and highly terrified that he will be yet again abandoned.  Pachabel, the chocolate dachshund, is terrified of everything.  Rachi, the husky, has known only us and has never not traveled with us.  Tiki, the red dachshund, is thirteen years old and really does not need the stress of a boarding situation. 
 There is nowhere else for us to stay. There is not another option. We do not have family that we can live with and I have no idea what to do with the bunny or lizard.  The best possible hotel deal will be almost $1000 for us and our three children currently at home.  Boarding the dogs would be over $900.   Moving our stuff and storage for that many nights is $2400.  These are all fairly low estimates, which do not include taxes or food.  Add in feeding the five of us for a week without a home and it is another $800.  So roughly $5000 because you cannot wait ONE MORE WEEK?  We cannot afford that and should not have to. We expected to close tomorrow and had to delay our proceedings while waiting for you.   While we would consider moving the 15^th, our bank cannot complete the paperwork in that amount of time. If you recall we have been waiting for confirmation from you that you are eligible to purchase this home.  Our purchase financing is contingent upon the sale of this home, until that was solid we could not move forward with our lender.  Our lender has indicated that they will be pressed to finish by the 22^nd so the 15^th is out of the question.   We have accommodated you, with considerable frustration.  We have agreed to terms we are not fully comfortable with just to get this house under contract and sold. In the grand scheme of things, what is one week?  Are you willing to offer us the $5000 for us to be homeless for a week so we can close on the 15th? This is a compromise point and we have gone above and beyond to accommodate you, despite the risk we have taken to extend the contract.  We have accepted less than the standard due diligence, without complaint. We have allowed you to settle your own financial situation with us bearing the burden of tremendous risk, all we ask is equal consideration. We cannot afford to stress our pets, ourselves, and our children, living in a hotel during a school week, which also happens to be the week of prom. It will be difficult enough moving that week without adding to it financial burden and displacement.
 We are not asking for much. We would simply appreciate the same consideration we have offered you during this entire experience.

The buyers live with their parents.  Seriously, what is one more week? We have been MORE than accommodating with their situation and it has been seriously stressful.  I will not vent any further about the buyer's agent. He was livid that we left a letter. Our agent told him we were upset that they were stonewalling and not willing to compromise.  He has has a pattern of arrogant prick behavior.  When this is all said and done, there will be a strongly worded letter and as many social media reviews as we can find.

Our life...

It's not always rainbows and butterflies, it's compromise that moves us along.

Maroon 5, She Will be Loved

Give it some thought

Have you ever considered how much time teacher's spend preparing lessons for students?  It has taken me since 8:30 this morning to cut cards for a vocabulary assignment.  It is now 1:07.  I have not been cutting cards all of that time. I've been juggling students for part of it.  You've heard the phrase cleaning when you have kids is like shoveling the driveway while it is still snowing out.   It's like that.

I do not like giving seat assignments and then sitting down to do something that needs to be done.  There are several reasons for this.  I feel guilty working on something instead of being in front of the students teaching.  I can't work with continual distraction.  I struggle to focus anyway.

Students today are so needy!  It amazes me how "helpless" they are when it comes to basic things.  How many words are there?  Um....how many did you count?  What page is chapter 7 on?  What does it say in the index, or when you turn through the book?  Do we have to write the question?  Seems like a valid question, other than I tell them the SAME thing every single time and have tried to make this clear since day one of work.  Do I need to write my name on it? Do you want credit?  I don't understand what we have to do. Have you read the instructions? No. *Raised eyebrow.

Do I know the answers to many of their questions?  Yes. Could I simply tell them the answer?  Yes.  Are they developing any type of self sufficiency when I just tell them the answer?  Not a bit.  When I first met Mr. MckTchr I hammered him on this.  His kids would ask him for an answer to one of their homework questions and I would get all over him if he just told them the answer.  Parents, help your child find the answer. Ask them questions, guide them to it.  Stop just giving it to them. It is not making them smarter. It is not making them self sufficient. You are not helping them and you are making my job harder!  I want to save my time for the real questions and real misunderstandings.

“If you will discipline yourself to make your mind self-sufficient you will thereby be least vulnerable to injury from the outside.”  Critias of Athens 

March madness

For the longest nothing was happening. We were having showing after showing and no offer.  Finally we have a buyer. Someone is interested. They looked at the house 3 separate times and we negotiated an acceptable offer.  Now it is feet to the floor running to the finish line.  We will be closing in 23 days.  If all goes as planned we will close on both houses that day.  I am skeptical that we can make it work, but hopeful.  It is so nice to not thoroughly clean the house every night and be scrambling to clean up before we leave each morning.

FIL has been in the hospital for the last week.  Pneumonia and a UTI...this after a rock pile of kidney stones, one creating a blockage.  They can't remove the rock pile until he is stronger and has a cardio eval.  Due to the extended stay in the hospital he has 20 days of transitional care before he gets to go home.  I am not 100% that he will be going home, nor am I certain that he needs to. He needs a home health plan and as of right now the VA is dragging its feet and he doesn't have too many other options.

We are also concerned about MIL. She is increasingly confused and can't/won't make decisions on her own. Mr. MckTchr has requested an appointment with her doctor for an eval.  We suspect there may be more to the confusion and forgetfulness than the stress of everyday life and typical aging.  Hopefully we will be a little closer to answers soon.

1st time out on rented kayaks
I prefer my Perception.

Life. There's always something.  I'm trying to get back to the gym more. Trying to take care of my own sanity and help Mr. MckTchr keep his.  Every other week when the skids are home it is difficult to maintain any sort of regular gym schedule.  We have to choose between gym and eating at a reasonable hour.  Something has to give. Between house stuff, in-laws, and kid events we are juggling and the balls are in danger of being dropped.  Personal health and stress maintenance is important too.

Looking forward to spring break.  Right after the move we will take off for the Island.  A week with a bay view and hopefully great paddle weather.

Feedback

Feedback: information about reactions to a product, a person's performance of a task, etc., used as a basis for improvement.

See that part, used as a basis for improvement?  Yes. That is what I need, REAL feedback.  Not, statements like not in the top 3, or interested let us know if other offers come in.  Also not the exact same statement you made the previous time you looked at the house.

We are having a problem with feedback on our house showings. They are either completely non existent or not helpful.  The latest causing irritation is an exact replica of the "feedback" they gave us on the first showing.  Very glad to have a second showing for this individual, but not very glad that it isn't going anywhere.

They are also saying the price is too high.  First, we just dropped it $3300 after three weeks of $500/week drops.  Second, we are on par with other houses our size and we have more upgrades than almost all the houses in our competitive range.  You may find one house with hardwood/laminate, or beautiful hardwood stairs with decorative iron spindles. You may find one with granite counter tops in the kitchen, tile floors and stainless appliances.  You may find another with tile floors in the bathroom, possibly even tile shower with glass shower closet.  You will most likely find another with a fenced back yard.  However, I doubt you will find one in our price range and size with all of that. So dear potential buyer, take your "price too high" and choke.  Furthermore, if it is too high then make a freakin' offer!  That's how this game is played. I know what I have to get for the house and you know what you can pay, let's talk.  This is not CarMax. The sticker price is not the price.  Make. An. Offer.

We have only had three potential buyers say the price was too high. We have had an equal or greater number say the price was right, but the house was just not right for them.  I think this pb is using "too high" as a strategy.

Here's the deal, I want to sale this house and I am willing to negotiate.  Are they waiting for us to offer a lower price???  Not the way this works. Buyer makes the first offer, not seller.  Lastly, I hate using sale and sell...never know if I'm using the right one no matter how many times I look it up.  Grammar police please let me off with a warning.

Ugh...just ready for this to be done. I'm ready to move. I'm ready for summer and opening the pool for long hours of floating with a happy drink.

I need a happy drink.

Back to the teaching board...

And glad to be there!  It has been a crazy week. We're still trying to sale the house. My FIL still has Parkinson's. The kid and skids still have activities to get to and from and the dogs still want to be fed.  No matter how crazy life gets, it still continues.

I'm hoping the law of averages will kick in and we will get an offer on the house soon.  We've had five showings in the last weekend.  Two Saturday, one Sunday and two today.

As for the FIL, there are good days and bad days. He is contrary and set in his ways. MIL is no better.

The above was written yesterday.  Continuing thoughts for today...
It is frustrating. It is nerve racking. It is life. We have to live it.  Dealing with aging parents is a responsibility. It is also difficult. You don't want to treat them like children, but they are acting like rebellious children. They are adults and you want to treat them like adults, but they won't listen and they don't see the dangers in their decisions.  The life cycle is at times cruel.  My FIL's body is betraying him. His medicines and age are changing him, corrupting his mind.  My MIL has always been taken care of so having to be the strong one is not natural to her.  I know she is frustrated. I know she is unsure of the future. I know that things are difficult.But sometimes we have to put on our big girl undies and deal!

Mr. MckTchr is pushing forward. He is being strong and trying to deal as best he can. Each day brings new frustrations on top of the old.  It is a struggle. What do you do when your parents can no longer care for themselves, won't listen to you, and you can't give up everything to care for them 24/7.  No one wants to say permanent residential facility, but that may be the way to go.

We would like to move them in with us, but if they still won't listen and still won't do what is needed it won't do any good.  The only benefit is having them close by so we can more quickly respond to falls.  VA assistance is a long list, we must wait and push to move up.  Home health is expensive and their insurance won't cover all that is needed.  A facility is also expensive.

Answers we seek...and miles to go before we sleep. *sigh.

LOL 1.31.16

What was the last thing that gave you a real, authentic, tearful, hearty belly laugh? Why was it so funny?

That was actually today. It is a conversation we have often. My husband, daughter and skid1 can do this thing with their uvula. It is a growling noise and they do it using a technique they say is like gargling without liquid. I can't do it. I do it and it sounds like an exorcism needs to be scheduled. Everyone gets a kick out of my attempts.

Prior to today I was overcome by giggles after eating chocolate covered espresso beans like popcorn throughout the day. Mr.MckTchr was trying to attach a TV to the kid room tv stand and I found his struggle hilarious. He did not. It was a real, authentic, tearful caffeine induced belly laugh that left me a little sore.


Laughter, excellent meds.

Daily prompt found at https://dailypost.wordpress.com/prompts/

Saturday saying 1.30.16

"The secrets are demanding to be free, heard by the world. Yet, I am not ready. I fear I never will be. Because if they are free, then where does that leave me?"

Reading a new Amazon Unlimited book, Trail of Broken Wings. The words above are powerful and true. When we hold on to something powerful, something that almost commands or defines our life, we risk being lost without it. In truth, we would likely be liberated after its release.  Facing the past, facing the dark secrets of our life, sets us free. Accept the reality and move forward. That doesn't mean forgive and forget, it means deal and move forward. Some issues are easier than others. Some require professional assistance. All require atttention. One should not be held back by the negative. Grow and become better for it.